The inner self is also called the higher self, as it lies in dimensions above our physical reality. But it is manifested within us as the inner self. I prefer to call it our inner self, because that is where it is found, by taking the inner journey. When this is called the higher self, people get the concept that it exists outside of us, up above. But you can only reconnect with this higher self by going within. You cannot connect with it by searching outside of your self.
The deeper you travel inward, the more you reconnect with this inner self. Now you are not different from this inner self. It is not a separate being. It is you. The little You, the aspect of you that is conscious of this life you are living, is identical to your inner self. Get used to feeling this. When you reconnect with your inner self you are awakening to more of who you already are. Let me repeat that; when you reconnect with your inner self you are awakening to more of who you already are. You are realizing who you truly are beneath the false coverings. When you wake from a dream, you understand that the you in the dream is identical to you in your waking state. They are different forms of experience, but the experiencer is the same person. So when one awakens to his inner self, to reconnect with that higher aspect of who you are, one will realize this immediately. There is no doubt. It is like waking from a dream. The little You, the false ego, is simply an illusion of misidentification of the Self. It’s like a mirage. It is a misunderstanding.
When I had my first major awakening in the late ’80’s so many revelations began issuing forth from the core of my Being like waves, one after the other. This continued for many months. When each revelation of Knowing emanated from within, they permeated my entire conscious existence. At first I felt like I was becoming those Knowings. That some how they became a part of my conscious existence. But in time I realized that I didn’t become anything new. I already was those Knowings. I am those Knowings. They were always who I was. It’s just that I had awakened to who I already am. The Knowings were non-different from who I am, and I always was those Knowings, and so many more eternally. It was simply a process of awakening to who I am. The I Am does not change. It just wakes up.
On the morning of Jan. 1, 2004, I had an even more profound awakening, which made the first major awakening pale in comparison. This was a much deeper awakening, and I was aware of many more profound Knowings of who I am. Again, these came like waves of revelations emanating from an even deeper aspect of my inner self. One of the first revelations was that I was whole again. Nothing was lacking. I had awakened to the fact that I am whole and complete within myself. Nothing more external was needed. This was a new and very satisfying feeling for me.
I had seen that my entire life I never felt complete. There was always something lacking, as though my consciousness was permeated with very large empty holes that constantly needed filling. I’m sure many of you feel this. There is always something lacking, so we spend our lives trying to fill these holes to feel whole. We work all day to try to fill these holes with so many external things and people. The new dress, the new techno gadget, the new car, the new house, the vacation, the night out on the town, the new toy, more food, drugs, alcohol and on and on it goes. And of course the most important thing for me was the intimate relationship. My “other half” to fulfill that emptiness within. Now, if we fill those gaping holes with external things and people, what happens? The holes don’t stay filled for long before they need to be filled again. This is a never ending struggle, always looking to acquire something to fill those holes. This is like filling holes with water. They temporarily get filled, we feel temporary satisfaction, and then the holes dry up or the water seeps through the earth and they are empty again. And how many crazy things have we done to try to fill up the emptiness?
Our lives become futile. We are never satisfied for long before a hole needs filling. The amazing thing is that this is such a major part of our existence and we don’t even see it. When it finally dawned on me what was happening, I was taken aback. How could I not see this so clearly before? Yes, I had a vague understanding, watching myself through the years always striving to become satisfied, but to truly awaken to it at such a profound level was quite astonishing; even embarrassing for a moment.
So the more we connect with our inner self, to who we truly are, the more naturally fulfilled we become. The holes don’t actually become filled as much as we awaken to the fact that there never were any holes. It was all a misperception of reality and who we truly are.
One also realizes that there are many levels to the inner self. There isn’t just one level of the inner self so to speak, but many many levels of that one inner self. There are several levels just within this Universe. But we are infinite. There are infinite levels of the one inner self. There is no end to to who we are. Therefore the inner journey is also endless. There is no destination any more than there is an end to infinity. Now the mind certainly cannot grasp That.
Our entire Self is like a giant fractal, which goes to infinity in each direction. In essence, the Self is continuous, without any separation from one point to the next. It is only for us to awaken to the deeper I Am. Where we are now is like being frozen in one point of our infinite existence. This short video will give you a glimpse of this:
But first of all, let’s awaken to the first level of our inner self. As soon as you awaken to the first level of your infinite self you feel complete, fully satisfied and awakened. The other levels come in time when the time is right. Once you awaken to the first level, there is no anticipation to connect higher, as you already feel complete. In a sense, all of the levels exist together. You just awaken to more of who you are. When you first connect to the present moment, there are certain sensations. But the more you delve into the present moment, the more is revealed. You Are the present moment, so you are awakening to more of who you are.
Our I AM presence is not only infinite, but also eternal. We always have existed and we always will exist eternally. Let’s consider this. We always have existed. This means we were never born. We were never created by some god or spawned from some golden light. Otherwise we could not be eternal. And he who is born, must also die. So these religions that proclaim that some god created us and we are subservient to that god is nothing but a lie. Funny how no one ever thinks of that. How can we be eternal and yet created by some god?
So we can get a glimpse of who we are in fullness, but our mind can never understand it. It is beyond comprehension. It can only become known through awakening to our inner self, which is who we truly are. There is only one inner Self, one You, but it seems like infinite levels of you as you awaken to more of Yourself. There is only one present moment, although it seems as if there are many moments throughout the day.
So I leave you with this to contemplate.
– Greg Calise